(Click on the link above and watch the clip “The Art of Multi-Dating” from the talk show “The Real”)
This video is an example of the reason why I felt burdened to start the Walking In Wholeness ministry. In the clip, Tamar explains her philosophy is, the best way to get over a man is to start dating a new one. Lies! (in my Tamar voice). I agree with Tamera and Jeannie about taking that time to heal because it’s not fair to the new guy and it’s not fair to you. Why bring the baggage of an old relationship into a new one, simply because you don’t want to be alone? Didn’t that kind of thinking get you into your current situation? And look what happened. So what if he starts dating someone else before you do? So what if it seems like he’s having fun and you’re not? The best thing a woman can do for herself is take time to heal. When you do that you win, because then you don’t need another person to depend on for fulfillment and satisfaction. While your ex is going from one person to another, you’re taking time out to take care of you. A healthy you leads to a healthier relationship. A quality, healthy relationship is so much better than just having any relationship.
Do you want any ole’ man, or the man designed for you that will compliment you and fit your God-given purpose? And if you don’t know your purpose, that’s even more reason to spend some time alone with you. You attract what’s in you, so if you’re filled with unresolved hurt and pain from a past relationship, then you’ll attract someone who isn’t healthy for you, because you’re not healthy. Then the cycle of unhealthy relationships continue. Don’t believe the lies that you’re supposed to move on to the next man when you break up with your ex. Love you enough to tend to your emotional wounds before dating someone else. When you take time for you, your perspective on what you truly desire might change. But how will you know if you don’t take the time?